Yeah. It happened today!?!?

Each year I wait for it. Each year it happens 2 or 3 times. It doesn't happen in summer (very often).
As many of you know I sell parts, I'm in the customer service business. "What can I get for you today Sir?" "How may I help you Maam?" "Would you like help with that?" These are all monicurs that roll forth from my yapper daily. Anyone who's ever been in this type of business knows you are always polite when interacting with a customer, but when they leave... all bets are off. Our customer's make us laugh, they make us mad, they leave us scratching our heads etc...

With that said, I've told this story many times to those I know but have never written it down for all to read. It usually goes something like this:

Me: What can I get for you today sir?
Old Man: Well, I bet you can't help me!
Me: Oh yeah, gimme a shot, what do you have there?
OM: It's a latch for my screen door.
Me: I see that, looks broke ;->.
OM: Yup. I've been all over this town and no one has been able to help me!
Me: Really, I've have that very thing right here. [Pull part from shelf & show OM]
OM: Yeah, you do have it... BUT... I bet you don't have it in white!?!?
Me: Actually I do, it's right here. [Pull white part from shelf & show OM]
OM: Oh......Well......How much is it?
Me: That'll be $14.99 plus tax.
OM: Mmmmm pretty proud of that there part!
Me: Well, that's just how much they cost, it's less than 20 bucks, not too bad I guess.
OM: Well, I'm gonna look around a little more and see if I can find it for less.
Me: OK. {The following only happens in my mind} Didn't you say you've been all over town looking for this part? Didn't you say no one has been able to help you yet here I stand, part in hand, ready to solve your problem for under 20 dollars? You prolly drive an old Chrysler Town Car that gets 2 gallons to the mile, and you're going to drive around more, maybe all the way across town, trying to save how much? How much can one save off of a $15 part? You're an idiot sir, you'll be back I know it!

Later that day....
OM: You still got that part?
Me: Let me check..........................Yep.
OM: Can you cut me a deal on it, gimme a break on the price?
Me: Nope, no can do, bosses get mad {hehehe I am the boss}
OM: Well, I think it's too much, but I guess I gotta do it [OM reaches in to wallet where several crisp hundred dollar bills are neatly lined up and pulls forth one of the aforementioned hunnies]
Me: Here's your eighty three dollars and sixty seven cents in change sir, have a great day!
OM: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

After a while I realized something about OM. Earlier that day when he first came in he had something to do. He had something to live for. For weeks his old lady kicks his behind everyday to "Git that dang door fixed". So when I had what he needed, I totally buzz killed his project. If he went home immediately following visiting me imagine how P-O'd his wife would be. "You've been puttin off that project for all this time when you could have finished it in an hour!" So he had to stall...He had to drive around for 6 or 7 hours to "accomplish" his task. Otherwise she's gunna find something else to nag about. But if it seems like the project was a PITA she'll leave him alone for a couple of weeks. It's the only rest he'll get until he dies, which will be before his wife cause he doesn't want to hear her nag, or do a project, so it's the next easiest thing!

1 comment:

Hola I'm Jeff said...

"How do I get farm porn off my computer?"