Twelve years, three hundred and sixty two days ago I married my Jeni. Everyday since (minus a few that aren't important enough to remember) has been a wonderful journey for the both of us. For me, it's been as if I am living each day with the one who's meant for me, like a perfect fitting shirt. It's hard for me, without humor, to express just how much you mean to me. But, on your special day I'll leave all the jokes behind. Even the ones about age...oops...

Happy 29th Birthday honey!?!?

Driving Blitches

Tonight I'm going to concentrate my negative Darth Vader energy on a single lane of traffic. Easy now, I can't blow my whole wad in the first two sentences, even though I usually do! Lately I've been noticing myself increasingly becoming upset with two particular "moves" that seem to happen on a regular basis in the right lane of traffic.

First - When there are multiple lanes of traffic, 2 or more, and there is no right hand turn lane. The farthest right lane is just a lane...yes you can turn from this lane, but you can also go straight. Maybe it's early in the day, maybe it's late in the day. Either way the streets aren't busy. So why do Jack-holes (Ya see I combined the two compound dirty words and created my own non-dirty, yet just as effective term) insist in stopping & traveling in this lane? Why, when there are other lanes to stop at the red light, do these people insist on stopping in the right lane? They aren't turning..., they're going straight. So why stop in the right lane and not give the people behind you the opportunity to turn right on the red light???

Second - When I come down the road on the street that enters my neighborhood I have to make a right. Again, there are multiple lanes of traffic on this road, specifically 3 lanes. So why do people travel in the right lane? There is no reason for this. There are no other right turns on this street for another quarter mile. Why does this upset me you might be thinking? Because the people who are traveling behind me, even though there are other empty lanes to choose from, they ride my tail as I have to slow down and make my turn. I've even had people swerve to "miss" me and honk in the process. [me thinking]="THERE ARE 2 OTHER LANES (THAT ARE EMPTY) TO CHOOSE FROM, WHERE NOBODY IS SLOWING DOWN AND TURNING JACK-HOLE, MOVE OVER AND PASS ME."

Anywho, I needed to get that off my mind and on to the WWW.COM for all 8 people I know to read it.

This, is the place?

If the 24th of July means anything to you, you are:
A: From Utah (Or very close to someone who is)
B: Mormon or
C: From North-Eastern Arizona

Every year for the past 4 summers this time of year gives me pangs in me belly for wanting to be in Utah. The 24th is a GREAT holiday there. Some say bigger than the 4th (some = Kris & Jim). I have to admit I like the 24th parade, it's kinda gay...yeah I said it...but I like it. My favorite parts are the bagpipe bands, pretty girl floats, cops on Harley's and the horses. I also like the people watching at the parade!?!?

I miss the B-B-Q's, I miss the sitting out late at night talking, I miss camping at the Spruces, I miss fireworks in /on the street. I also miss having the day off work when I know good and well the rest of the country doesn't have the day off, it makes me feel like I'm gettin' over!

So if you're there (Utah) and enjoying the holiday...I'm not going to write what I'm thinking but, it's not nice...

Happy Pioneer day everybody!!!

Blogger's block?

I am going to post, even though I don't feel like. Mostly because I'm afriad of my wife, and how she treats me when I don't post :->! I made some mistakes this last weeks which has caused me to work a lot of hours, nobodies fault but my own. When I work a lot I don't have much to say, work is work ya know? Next time I'll take a tip from Santa and make a list then check it twice, although my list is the work schedule!?!?

I did take the liberty of leaving work early yesterday to spend some time with the family.

Problem: A major golf championship is playing this weekend.

I don't know why but I'm a degenerate for the 4 golf majors, but I am. When it comes to the Masters, US Open, British and the PGA I just have to follow them. I have a couple of confessions to make regarding it:

I have missed work to watch a major.

I have missed church to watch a major.

I have neglected my family to watch a major.

I have neglected personal hygiene to watch a major.

Just kidding..., kind of...

I did get out of the lazy boy long enough to spend some one on one time with Sammy The Bull. As you may have read on Jen's blog she & I went bowling. We got coupon... So we took advantage and went. PS - Real bowling is much more difficult than Wii bowling. You, are smart, and prolly know that. I seem to forget these little details in life. I have to be honest, by the third frame of the second game Sam & I were ready to call it quits. Swingin' a 16 pound ball 30 or 40 times gets ya worked up, at one point I even felt that single bead of sweat roll down my back and in to my crack! Don't go eeewww..., you know what I'm talkin' bout!?!?

After bowling she and I headed to Savers. Some people may like Nordstrom or Dillards or Macy's, I like Savers or DI or Goodwill. I'm a huge thrift store fan. I would venture to say 50% of my clothes were purchased at a thrift store. Does that sound weird? Oh well. I love lounging in athletic shorts and a T shirt. Guess what they have a tone of at thrift stores? Athletic shorts and T shirts!?!? Yeah Me!?!? All we bought was a pot, no not "pot", but a pot...to cook in...It's actually a science experiment. The girls bought a crystal growing kit at Hobby Lobby and the instructions reads, WHAT ELSE YOU WILL NEED "an old sauce pan which is no longer used for cooking". Again, that's why I love thrift stores, where else can you get a throw away pot for $2.50?

Anyway, I have to work again today so I've got to be off.

Uniform - Check

Keys - Check

Money clip - Check

Pen - Check

Phone - Check

DVR set to record golf - Double Check

Have you seen this man?

First, of all please take a minute and scroll down to my "This is the stuff I don't like" on the left side of my blog.







Second, look at the 4th entry down from the top, it should be the Oxyclean guy. I added this about 4 months ago by the way...





Now my story:





I had to work today - NBD (no big deal) - I work every Saturday. This morning at around 9:15 an attractive lady and her son (maybe age 6 or 7) came in to my store. She asked for help and I offered my assistance. I helped her find the couple of items she was looking for, she thanked me, I thanked her and went about my business. She took her item to the front register to be rung up, again NBD.



When she had paid, and left, my cashier told me her son said to his mom "That guy who helped us looked like the Mighty Putty Man."



Do you know who the Mighty Putty Man is?



HE'S THE SAME GUY AS THE OXYCLEAN GUY!!! - NOW I'LL HAVE TO SHAVE MY BEARD...

Photo Tagged By Kaylee

Kaylee photo tagged me in her blog so here goes. You'll get a glimpse in to my personal life:

Self Portrait

What are my kids doing right now

Favorite shoes

Closet

Dream vacation - Alaskan cruise

Favorite room

Bedroom

There you have it!!!

Don't put my steak in your balloon as a hobby.

I'm pretty upbeat, I'm pretty positive, I like to see the good in things / situations, I'm an optimist. With that said..., I'm about to go all soapbox on a few things.



First - water balloons. I hate water balloons. YES I know they're supposed to be fun, YES I USED to play with them as a kid. More specifically speaking I hate balloons, even more specifically I hate latex (does a double specifically make an un-specifically?). I hate the smell, I hate the texture, but mostly it's the smell. I don't think I have globophobia, I just think it's a general loathing of latex. I hate rubber bands, I hate rubber gloves and when I was younger my siblings would torture me we the rubber bands from off the daily newspaper, they would put them in their mouths, pin me down, then chew them right in front of my face. EEEWWW GROSS... Today at Target both the girls got a 100 pack of water balloons, and I had to give lessons on how to tie off a balloon. When I find myself in Hell with Satan and his followers my plight will be tying off balloons all day, every day... I just know it. It was fun teaching a skill to my girls however, they both got it with the "2-finger" technique.



Second - Black Angus. Now I'm not talking about the cow, I have nothing against cow's, as a matter of fact they're delicious, mmm... I'm talking about the restaurant - Stewart Anderson's - Jen and I had a gift certificate for $25 and thought it would be nice to eat there today as a family. SIDENOTE ON HOW WE GOT THE GIFT CERTIFICATE - (We originally gave it to Jen's dad as a present for his birthday. We got a phone call from him saying "Um this is kinda weird but... there aren't anymore Black Angus joints here in Utah". So we sent him a different gift certificate, and he sent us that one back.) I know why there aren't any more in Utah, they're horrible - Yes I see the irony - But it has been a long time since I've been and I must have forgotten. Jen's folks always used to get these great coupons to the place, and that would make it worth it. You would have to have a coupon 'cause the cheapest thing in the place is a piece of chicken for $15. We wanted steak so each plate was $21. Good thing I had $25 bucks to the place or I'd a walked out. Sub-par food, sub-par portions, OK service, but for that price Jen & I agreed Sizzler would be a much better choice. Stewart Anderson's = Highly overrated



Third - Hobby Lobby. Now I must note, this will prolly be an unpopular blitch...
BLITCH = To complain about something when writing on a blog.
Most of the people who read my blog are women, and maybe for them Hobby Lobby is great... 'cause it's a huge crap..., oops..., craft store. If you're going to name your place Hobby Lobby have some damned "Hobby" stuff there. Hobby stuff are things like model rockets, model cars, remote control airplanes, remote control cars, erector sets, train sets, etc... And don't even think about commenting with something to the effect of "Crafting IS a hobby" BULL - When someone says hobby, we all think of some nerdy guy in his basement coloring his toy soldiers to place on his civil war re-enactment set he bought off TV from TIME-LIFE. BTW - They had like 2 aisles of what I would define as "hobby" stuff and 148 aisles of crap, super crap. Their business model seems to be, double the price of everything, then mark everything 50% off. What a rip!?!? I would walk by some widget or a what-not and think "I would pay $10 for that" then I would turn it over and see a sticker for $21.99, then I would look up to see a sign saying "What-not's & widgets 35% off". I will end by saying going in to this store was a very emasculating event, I could actually see the despair on the faces of my fellow brethren also relegated to this misery!



I will say this post was not about the company, but about the itinerary. I loved spending the day with the fam.

3 Word Wednesday

Victim

Perp

OUCH!